rusty springs, an adventure from the knife-shaped sphere, troika exclusive

(drawing by Tony Jaguar)

The earth is .00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 percent of the universe

The time one human life exists is .00000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 percent of the time that the universe has existed

What does this mean?

Even .0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 is not the same as 0

You are either constantly trying to do more or you must admit you are not 'serious' about what you are doing

Doing a little is more than doing nothing

What am I trying to say right now?

I don't know, 

These are things I try to consider in my writing 

I am being 'off-topic'

The following is an unreleased adventure I wrote a while back that I’ve decided against publishing (outside of this blog post). I feel I’ve improved since writing this adventure and I have more 'interesting projects' I’d rather focus on releasing.

I don't consider a draft 'done' until I drive it 'miles' away and drop it off in the middle of the 'woods', to see if it will be able to make it back home.

(the park is loosely based on oak mountain state park)


The presence of the possum girl has negatively affected the tree’s immense happiness. All the beautiful leaves are gone but there’s always a song; cicadas in the summer, hooting owls in the fall, and coyotes howling in the dead of winter.

Start the party with an extra player, you can play them. The thing is they will get abducted shortly after the start of the game and disappear. Rule number 3 of surviving a horror movie is to never, ever, ever, under any circumstances say, 'I'll be right back'. You won't be back. Trail cameras are installed in the trees throughout the park. Their wires have been hastily buried in the ground and provide a live feed to the bunker. If anyone tampers with the trail cameras they are rigged to blow up (damage as firebolt).


1. You don't have service outside of your campsite or the parking lot. 2. Fuck the police, there are no police in the knife-shaped sphere. 3. You can say the party is meeting up after their first year since graduating college or celebrating the anniversary of a major event they all shared.

Bad guys & gals

Harmony AKA Possum Girl All she ever wanted to be was a hairdresser. Possum humanoid found in the park as a child and raised by the rangers. (Skill 9, Stamina 16, Initiative 3, Armor 0, Damage as weapon or modest beast) Possessions: BIG Shears (damage as maul +1) High Powered Binoculars Advanced Skills: (roll under Harmony's skill from above) Evanescence - the act of vanishing quickly Possum shit - climbing, resistance to toxins and diseases, hanging from your tail, it's a catch-all for whatever makes sense possums can do 'well' Special: If Harmony reaches 0 stamina she will respawn 1d3 rounds later with her skill and stamina halved (they always come back). Mien: 1] Bringing the doom. 2] Hungry and hateful.
3] Making sub-animalistic noises and sounds. 

Park Rangers There are 3 rangers in the park. They're all in cahoots with Harmony. They will try to separate the party. (Skill 5, Stamina 7, Initiative 2, Armor 1, Damage as weapon) They drive around on a shared Troikasawki (see below). Possessions: Walkie Talkie Handcuffs Pistol Pepper Spray Baton Mien: 1] Nodding out a bit. 2] Cruel. 3] Overly friendly. Troikasawki Seats 4 comfortably, has a 'make friends with your local squirrel' bumper sticker, and a maximum speed of 28 mph. (Skill as driver +1, Stamina 10, Initiative 1, Armor 3, Damage as modest beast)

Bear (I recommend this book)
Likes honey. Isn't from Darkest, Peru. (Skill 8, Stamina 12, Initiative 2, Armor 1, Damage as large beast)

Mien: 1] Threatening 2] Sarcastic 3] Crushing plants

Alligator A large pokey-toothed guy. (Skill 7, Stamina 9, Initiative 2, Armor 2, Damage as modest beast)

Mien: 1] Starving 2] Hidden 3] Blankly staring back

2d6 Encounters (roll the same encounter twice and Harmony appears)

2. Trash bag full of erotic magazines. One of them is a comic book about a strong and slippery robot. 3. Recently burnt king-size mattress. 4. An old pistol loaded with 1d6 bullets halfway buried just a little ways off the path. 5. An old tree covered with initials and hearts with dates to the early 1900s. Also carved into the tree is the phrase 'FUNNY + SAD + STRANGE = NO HOPE'. 6. A guy yelling at trees. Seems to be acting out a play. Will run away if interacted with. 7. Bear trap is hidden under foliage (damage as maul). 8. A lonely boomerang (damage as club) that has 'you'd better come back' painted on it. 9. A woman taking pictures of her per tortoise in different places. Will warn the party about a bear and then leave the park. 10. A rusty shopping cart with many types of potato chips, they're all past their expiration date. 11. A bear taking a shit. Don't make eye contact. 12. Mushrooms!!! (I'm not talking about that porcini shit, I'm talking about that Houdini shit)


Test luck then roll on the appropriate table for effect. All effects last 1d6 rounds.

Shrooms Go Good (success)

1. Walk on water 2. Night vision 3. Spider climb 4. Sprout a cool second head 5. Glow in the dark 6. Double in size (like Mario)

Shrooms Go Bad (failure)

1. Diarrhea 2. Blind 3. Paralyzed 4. Sprout a mean second head 5. Turns you into a mushroom 6. Lose 1d6 stamina

2d6 Locations

2. Parking Lot - There’s an info board with a map of the park and an empty brochure rack.

3. Bridge - Made out of wood. It’s only wide enough to walk across. It stretches out over a deep ravine.

4. Campsite - The players hiked in carrying all the equipment to the site. There's no electricity but there’s a water spigot. 

5. Dock - 'Beware alligators' sign. Frogs croak loudly unless Harmony is nearby. Many mosquitos. The lake reeks of sickness.

6. Ranger Cabin - There’s a stereo system along with a collection of records (goodby yellow brick road is on the platter of the record player). A book on herbalism next to a bottle of Bim Jeam. Only one of the four light switches works. Plaid wool blankets have been nailed over the windows. There’s a microwave and a copy machine. If anyone uses them both at the same time a fire will start. There’s one park brochure in the tray of the copy machine. Next to the microwave is a box full of popcorn and ramen noodle cups. Outside is a shed full of water bottles.

7. Bathrooms / Showers - The lights don't work. Filthy as hell.

8. Playground - There’s a tire swing. The slide is metal and anyone paying close attention to it will notice steam rising (damage as maul if anyone goes down the slide, when in doubt everything is always damage as maul). 

9. A manhole -  Leads to the bunker.

10. A herd path -  On the side of the trail going up a steep slope that leads to a large grotto in the face of a rock. Several chairs, a table, and a cabinet full of notebooks full of poetry (give any players that write a poem irl 1d3 [permanent] luck).

11. Bunker - Has: an entire toilet, a broken television, a broken mini fridge, a moldy fuzzy pink small pet bed, a tangle of wires and cords, several broken chairs, a mud-caked shovel, a rusted rake, a few broken lamps, a few spades, hand axes, and pile of dirty rotted clothes, an open cage with a mattress inside, barrels containing many types of non-perishable foods, canned tuna, canned stews, MRE's, Reese’s peanut butter cups. A big plastic fish tank with luna moth eggs and caterpillars. Across the tank on a wooden table rests a very delicate large sewn collage of silky lime green moth wings. This is where their friend is found. Bound in premium Saran Wrap in a cage like an old-fashioned mermaid wearing a tiara made of shotgun shells and tinsel. The trail cameras provide a 24/7 surveillance feed to an old CRT television.

12. Sightseeing Tower - A latter leads 100’ up to an observation tower

Trail Descriptions: Although trails are clearly marked you should always have a map 

1. A rugged dirt path. This area is very dry, be careful to avoid starting a forest fire. It's the oldest route in the park. Along this nature trail, you’ll find signs that share information about the plants, and animals native to the park.

2. A quite easy graveled path. Among a slight clearing in the trees is an old artillery weapon. 

3. This trail leads you far into the quiet spruce forest. Halfway in a few small stream crossings are found which lead to the lake. There are wading cables at each stream to assist hikers when crossing. Many forest flowers and berries grow here.

4. A long touring route with plenty of height differences and landscapes ranging from open fells to spectacular old pine forests. A few wood shelters and several lean-tos are found slightly off the trail. This trail gradually climbs up to the slope of MAKE OUT PEAK.

5. This trail is stony and the roots make it challenging. There are ascents and descents along this route and hikers should be in considerably good shape. It leads to a sightseeing tower with a magnificent view. 

6. This trail that provides many great views along the lake is partially made of boardwalks and duckboards of aged to weak condition. It’s poorly visible in bad weather conditions and the dark. 

d6 Environmental Atmosphere

1. A thick lingering misty fog like a conscious dream hindering vision.

2. An uninvited rainstorm beats down like drums on the leaves.

3. Cold strong wind that stings the tears in the corners of your eyes

4. Buttery tones of periwinkle clouds circling the trees.

5. The sky turns red.

6. Everything is laced with pollen.

(if you'd like to support me there are links on the right to purchase my zines)

No comments:

Post a Comment